


Time Bomb

by misbehavingvigilante



Series: Tales Inspired by the Discord Year 1 [17]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Addiction, Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Alternate Universe, Child Abuse, Gen, Howard Stark's A+ Parenting, M/M, The Umbrella Academy (TV) Spoilers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-05
Updated: 2019-07-22
Packaged: 2020-04-08 10:02:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 14,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19104886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/misbehavingvigilante/pseuds/misbehavingvigilante
Summary: The circumstances of what draw them back together aren’t great.Or, an Umbrella Academy AU.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Fluffypanda](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fluffypanda/gifts).



>   
> I stayed mostly faithful to the original prompt provided by fluffypanda but I also added a few spins my own as well. So while this is an Umbrella Academy AU, it will be more inspired rather than directly following the events of the netflix show. I warned for spoilers because well, it's been out for months, but I figure well, I guess someone out there might want a heads up I'll be spoiling a lot of things, lol.  
>    
> In regards to additional warnings, you should note that The Umbrella Academy deals with romance between adopted siblings so if that's a squick for you, you might not want to read this, it also deals quite heavily with child abuse too, there are other several other themes that I haven't warned for as this is the first chapter so I think that covers most of them. 
> 
>    
> I used the Howard Stark A+ Parenting tag, because well, he's a shitty dad, let's face that, and I will call that out, so uh if you're a fan of him you may not want to read this. Or if you're easily triggered by mentions of child abuse, thus far everything that's everything I think, but I'll try to warn as I go.  
>    
> I think? Hope? that's everything, if you think I need to add anymore tags/warnings, please let me know. With that said, enjoy!  
>    
> Also, please note I'm a chronically ill writer so I'll do my best to be consistent with updates, I don't think this will be too long, so it should be fine, but just a warning in advance. I wrote this section like 2-3 weeks ago, so   
> 

The circumstances of what draw them back together aren’t great.

Tony certainly isn’t going to say he’s come back because he’s here to mourn, Howard was many, many, many things but Dad was never one of them. The man might have adopted them all sure, but that didn’t make him a parent, that didn’t mean he loved them.

Or that they were all really siblings either, he’d always been kicked out of that club given his lack of powers. A fluke of incredibly creepy circumstances of all their births to begin with, that while some had powers, others apparently didn’t.

Tony wasn’t sure why Howard kept him, probably because he had known too much to cast back and out into the world.

So there he was the fringe, forgotten member of their little group.

Things had fallen apart after Natasha’s disappearance, their little spider had been the one who had spun the web that bind them together and with her gone, none of them had stayed. No one but Steve, Steve who…

Tony had to shake that thought out of his head, it had been years.

Whatever was wouldn’t be again. It had just been the right set of circumstances that was all, the isolation of their upbringing, the closeness fostered by the proximity they had been to each other, and just a good mix of a teenage hormones brewing.

Tony usually was one for making an entrance, maybe a lifetime of being ignored and overlooked had made him attention starved but he entered the mansion quietly as if afraid to announce his presence. It isn’t as if he’ll be the only one here, maybe he’s hoping he’ll be able to run into Jarvis or Maria alone and get the scope on what exactly happened without seeing anyone. 

But then he does actually want to see how his quasi siblings are doing. There’s still hope for Natasha, even all these years later that perhaps she could slip back into the time stream and show up on their side. Tony has done the research and Natasha’s drive had always been a scary, scary thing.

If anyone is capable of being stranded in time and returning unharmed, it is her.

The others, well, Tony has kept tabs. His expertise in technology affords him a lot aside from Steve who seems to still think this is the nineties, and doesn’t keep with the times. Bucky is a close second, he has a sparse online appearances because his abilities makes it difficult to keep his shit together. Increasing surveillance everywhere and everyone has a camera phone these days so in his haunted episodes trying to escape what it’s like to convene with the dead sometimes that crops up online. Tony gets rid of what footage there is, they might not be on the best terms but Bucky deserves his dignity.

Bruce is a bit of an odd case, he pops up for a while and then vanishes again no doubt due to his own abilities. Playing host to something very green and angry from another dimension sounds like fun until you slip up and suddenly someone is dead because of you. There are stable episodes at least, enough so that Bruce had been able to go to school and gotten a few degrees in the past that’s passed. People are still fearful of him, something Bruce return with that eternal deer in headlights look he always seems to have. Bruce had been his science buddy back in the day, a rare common interest that he had something in common with someone super powered.

Clint isn’t subtle, but then Clint was never all that subtle. He had literally ran off to the circus of all places, his abilities may have been supernatural, but damn, they did make for a good show. His marksmanship was out of this world quite literally. It had been easy to get along with Clint who had a natural leanings towards mischief the same as Tony had. He isn’t the most popular of all his siblings, despite his notoriety, there’s still Thor. 

Thor was a celebrity. It wasn’t all due to his power, but it was hard to know how much was true and not when someone had reality altering powers. A certain cue was needed of course, things weren’t that easy even when super powered, but it was a useful ability. Thor had been rather loveable even before the camera and lights, he had a certain softness to him that made him seem serene but at the same time an edge that promised he could deliver equally bad things. Mostly because people got it mixed up that Thor’s superpower was super strength with how well toned he was. There had been marital problems, Tony usually didn’t need to step in with the team surrounding Thor being good at their jobs with holding back the media from what they published but occasionally his skill was needed.

“T-Tony?”

Tony turned, coming face to face to Steve all these years had been more difficult than he thought. Even after he reminded himself why things had been like they were, it made him nostalgic for the past. Made him foolishly hopeful for an alternate timeline where things hadn’t gone wrong and maybe he got to see how right or how wrong he’d ben about his predictions.

“Steve.” Tony said, carefully measured.

It may have made him sound like an asshole, but was better than letting his voice crack.

The distance between them was helpful right now, ideally he wanted to keep that, not trusting his traitorous body not to melt if Steve was affectionate towards him.

“I wasn’t sure that you’d be here.” Steve admitted after a long pause, when it seems like the only thing he is doing is trying to commit his features to memory. As if Tony doesn’t have a rather large digital presence himself, he had a successful company.

“I’m not here for him.” Tony would not hide that fact, Howard may have not treated any of them kinder, but he had always had it out for Tony.

He’d been singled out. 

“I’m just happy you’re here.”

Tony blinked. “Did you finally manage to find enough alcohol that actually affects that behemoth of a healing factor you got there?”

“I wasn’t drinking.”

“That’s a shame. I could use a drink. Where’s Bucky? He always knew the appreciation of the finer things in life.”

“Tony.” Steve warned.

Tony recognized that tone, he had heard it more than once, most notably the last time they had spoken when Tony suggested he could help with his tech expertise, not even in the field, but behind the scenes but apparently even Steve hadn’t backed his play.

Steve who had suggested even that was too dangerous for someone like Tony.

Someone ordinary, Steve meant though he never said, he hadn’t needed to say it.

Ah, the familiar taste of bitterness. That was a good balm against stupid thoughts about wondering what it might be like to kiss Steve since they never got to, even all those years back.

Always on the cusp of something, never able to even take a single step forward.

Tony ignored Steve, walked through the mansion, surprised and not by how nothing and everything had changed and then located the bar. Bucky had seemed to be helping himself to something that looked promising for the occasion. Tony sat beside him, pouring a drink of his own.

“So how you been?”

“The usual.” Bucky answered, before squinting at him with somewhat bloodshot eyes. “You’re not dead, right?”

“No, not yet at least.”

“Ah. Good.”

“Glad you’re not dead either, buddy. Captain righteous is easier to deal with when you’re not the only target.”

“You’re telling me.” Bucky let out a deep sigh, Tony had wanted to ask about it but then, it wasn’t like Bucky would probably talk to him about it. He had always been close to Natasha and Steve.

Well, Natasha had disappeared, and Steve’s expectations could drown you quite easily even if he regarded you as friend.

“To disapproval.” Tony chimed, raising his glass.

Two glasses clinked instead him, and Tony blinked at the intruding third figure, watching as Clint downed a shot.

“What?” Clint raised an eyebrow. “Been so long you forgot my face?”

“I’ve seen the posters. Very pin up like.”

“My face is not the highlight of those posters.”

“I could tell that by the fact you weren’t wearing pants.” Tony countered. “I always banked on you taking up stripping, not joining the circus.”

“Well, I can’t shoot people in a strip club.” Clint argued before considering that for a moment. “I mean, I could but I wouldn’t get any money for it. They would say that’s bad for business as if my aim isn’t a work of art.”

“That’s true. Seen some clips. Crowd loves you. You always did grow on people, like a fungus.” Tony said, however it lacked heat given he and Clint had joked around when they were younger, if it would still be the same now was a question. 

“Same sparkling personality as always.” Clint laughed. “I can see how you’ve already pissed off the Captain. He did always seem to like you best.”

“Well, that’s just untrue. You know Thor is the favorite.”

Clint nodded, “It is hard to hate Thor, and it’s like hating sunshine.” 

“I am glad to see my family still speaks so highly of me.” Thor’s grin was bright, though it was slightly soured by Steve’s glowering face in the entranceway besides him. “Particularly when we have not met for a while.”

“Like we said, we just can’t hate you Thor.” Tony smiled back. “Caught your last flick. The rom com genre suits you very well. Always can be nice to branch out and try new things.”

Thor got Bucky, Clint and him all in a hug given their proximity.

Thor hugs were always rather good though so the complaining was surface level only, or at least on his end. It’d been hard to know exactly how Bucky and Clint felt given the years, but in the past that would have been the case.

“I didn’t realize we were having a group hug.” Bruce said softly, having apparently been there all along blending into the furniture.

Thor let them go finally and went to hug Bruce who had looked a little green just before Thor had stopped and returned to the bar. Apparently he had already hugged Steve since he hadn’t flocked over to him though Steve made his way to his bar, eyes distinctively on him, and thus Tony sought refuge with Bruce.

Bruce who didn’t like being overwhelmed with too many people at a time, if it was just them, it was an asshole move to take advantage of Bruce like this, but then Tony had always been an asshole.

“You know, it’s rude to use me to avoid Steve.”

“Well, Brucey, he shouldn’t have did what he did.” Tony said, resting his head in Bruce’s lap who only sighed at the action, but didn’t look uncomfortable. “I caught your last science conference. Seemed like your biggest one yet.”

“Some days are easier.”

“I’m sure some scientists wouldn’t mind if you smash some of them. Like ones that don’t cite their sources, or the ones who try to pass off things that can’t be replicated under any other testing than their own like those anti vax people.”

“God, those people are annoying.”

“See? We agree. That’s good, right?” Tony grinned again. “Don’t tell Thor, but you were always my favorite.”

“Hm, I thought Steve was your favorite.”

“Where would you get that idea from?” Tony asked.

“I know that you two had a thing or almost a thing.” Bruce explained in his calm, coaxing voice. “I don’t know the specifics, but it did mess him up afterwards. Natasha’s disappearance, he could soldier on from, but not you.”

“We all left around the same time.”

Bruce reminded. “I was the second last to leave.”

“That-“ 

“We’re starting.”

The no nonsense tone had come again and Tony rolled his eyes. Sometimes it was hard to remember why he missed Steve. Why they had to have some kind of ceremony at all and pretend that Howard was a good father was beyond him too.

But if it helped give closure maybe it wasn’t useless at least.

The courtyard was a good of place as any, Tony figured. Jarvis had joined them finally and he had been comforted by that sight enough so he didn’t say anything when Steve started to speak. Not that he listened, but soon something else grabbed his attention.

Something in the sky, like a crack of reality showing itself and showing the scene of some adjacent reality with a woman. A red haired woman.

The weather picked up ominously as she did whatever she did.

“Get behind me.” Steve pushed himself to the front, corralling the rest of them behind him, but not then alone as Thor joined him and helped to shield them as well from whatever the threat might be. Tony wasn’t sure how much that would help all things considered, but he didn’t have anything helpful to suggest at the moment either.

There was a form hitting the ground, a familiar shaped form but young, much too young.

“Natasha?” Bucky had been the first to speak, but Clint had been the first one to reach her.

She looked as old as she had the day she had disappeared.

Tony wondered how that was possible but then he remembered in his own studies how weird time could be, add superpowers to mix, and who knew what might happen?

“You’re all here.” Natasha sounded fondly, and she was not someone who had been prone to be that open and honest with her feelings. She looked down at her hands and the rest of her body. “Well, fuck.”

“L-Language.” Steve had whispered, looking at her as if he had seen a ghost.

All of them likely had the same expression right now.

The entire world had just changed.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I would like to see those notes.” Steve said, eyes glancing back at Tony. His gaze lingering far too long for it to just have been a look of acknowledgement.
> 
> Natasha held back a chuckle, some things still hadn’t changed, it didn’t surprise her those two hadn’t been able to sort through their problems after her disappearing act.
> 
> Tony winked, “It’s all digital, baby, so you’d have to learn how to use a computer.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Blue for cheerreading this! I forgot to mention that last chapter, but again thanks. 💙
> 
> So I think the only additional warning in this chapter is the aspect of addiction, I did warn for that in the notes since it'll crop up from time to time. So I don't think it'll be too overly graphic at this point, but I figured it'd better to warn for it than not. 
> 
> This chapter got here a lot faster than I expected that's for sure. So again if you feel like I missed any tags/warnings let me know. With the said, enjoy.

She is happy to see everyone again.

It's the first full breath of relief, Natasha had been able to take in decades with the knowledge, yes, she is home, and her family is here.

The relief is tempered by the knowledge of what is to come, and what she has done in those years since. What to say, and what to keep to herself is still not something she had come to terms with. 

A secret alone could unravel all her efforts, and make all for naught. 

But she has for the most part always kept things close to her chest, no one has ever known all of her, and now that is even more true. 

She has all these thoughts in the span of eating the sandwich, Clint had made for her, but then, Clint had often expressed affection through food. It wasn’t an avenue he had been able to express always given their so called father and all those restrictions, but banded together, all of them could and would cover for one another.

The silence is somewhat stifling, paired with all eyes on her.

It’s expected, of course, but Natasha also feels like going ‘boo’, if they really are going to regard her as a ghost, she might as well play along with it.

“I projected my consciousness forward in a suspended quantum state of myself that exists throughout all instances of time.” Natasha explained.

“Right.” Tony spoke first. “That makes sense.”

“You really need to learn to share your notes, Tony.” Bruce sighed, but he didn’t have that same look of blanket confusion on everyone else’s face that told Natasha he understood what she was saying to some degree.

“I would like to see those notes.” Steve said, eyes glancing back at Tony. His gaze lingering far too long for it to just have been a look of acknowledgement.

Natasha held back a chuckle, some things still hadn’t changed, it didn’t surprise her those two hadn’t been able to sort through their problems after her disappearing act.

Tony winked, “It’s all digital, baby, so you’d have to learn how to use a computer.”

Steve narrowed his eyes, annoyed at the slight, but also seemingly somewhat flustered at the usage of ‘baby’ aimed towards him, at least that’s how it looked to Natasha. “I know how to use a computer.” 

“How are you two back at this again when she just came back?” Bucky groaned, letting out a long suffering sigh.

Clint nodded, “Yeah, I gotta agree.”

“Let us focus on our long lost sister’s return.” Thor suggested, but it was hard to argue with Thor when usually he was so easy to get along. Not nearly as dumb as people pegged him, and he gave the best hugs, Natasha had been looking forward to one of those. Right now she also appreciated him reigning in Tony and Steve, who both at least had the decency to look a little ashamed for hogging the spotlight.

“Thanks.” Natasha gave a faint smile to which Thor returned with a blinding smile of his own. Yep, very much like sunshine still. “I don’t have that much to say, though. I was gone for such a long time, it’s… a bit of a blur?”

“A blur?” Clint raised an eyebrow, regarding her curiously to anyone else that was looking, but to her, it looked more like suspicion.  

“Well, Dad said time travel could have mental and physical consequences.”

“He’s dead, Steve.” Tony pointed out, as if they weren’t all here for the funeral, well aside from Natasha, who had just missed it. Lucky her. “You don’t have to call him that any longer.”

“It’s not as if he’s around…” Bucky added, though he didn’t appear particularly sober so Natasha wasn’t quite certain if his abilities could work properly through that haze. They hadn’t in the past, at least.

“That isn’t the point. He did-” Steve tried, cut off when Tony stood suddenly and the chair behind scrapping loudly against the kitchen floor, leveling Steve with a glare that would have made a lesser man flinch. 

“Right, of course, it isn’t.” Tony’s eyes left Steve and found hers, free of any bitterness and looking fond instead. “Natasha, dearest, glad you’re back. Wasn’t the same without you.” 

She nodded softly, while she hadn’t needed the verbal acknowledgement that Tony was happy to see her again, that had been obvious by his body language, it still had been nice to hear particularly when it seemed she wouldn’t be seeing much of him.

“I’ll be around the next time one of us dies or get married. Since again, that’s how this works.” Tony addressed the room at large, and then waved. “Ciao.”  

“Tony!” Steve called after him, the chair behind him clacking against the floor in his haste to follow after Tony’s fleeting form. Bruce who both always had been closest to Tony and something of a habit of choosing the seat closest to the exit was able to block the entrance way.

Not with his powers, but rather just by standing there, that alone seemed enough to make Steve pause, even though it looked like he was debating the merits of pushing through and running after Tony.

“Just let him go.” Bruce suggested calmly. “Try again later. You have time.”

Natasha bit the inside of her cheek, a mask of careful nonchalance to anyone else. “The more things change, the more they stay the same, huh?”

“I don’t think any of us are close enough to someone to get married.” Clint said, out loud, before seemingly remembering something that made him wince. “Sorry, big guy.” He patted Thor’s arm gently in return.

“I could use a hug.” Thor admitted and as requested, Clint hugged him.

“Natasha, can I still borrow your clothes?”

“You’re still wearing my clothes?” Natasha asked, but then didn’t wait for an answer, it could have been a way to process her disappearance, aside from just how Bucky liked to dress. Maybe it was more surprising she had outfits left that Bucky could still wear, then again, when she’d been younger, and noticed things disappearing from her closest, instead of saying anything, she had simply started to get clothing that could be worn by someone bigger than her, but could be adjusted for her size as well. “We should go shopping sometime.”

“As long as you go with me.”

“Sure, but Steve could also take you. Right, Steve?” Natasha roped him back into this conversation instead of looking longingly through the hallway.

“Yes, of course.” Steve answered, finally.

“Right, well, while we’re all… well, most of us, are still here, is there anything else we need to discuss?” Bruce asked, acting again as the voice of reason.

 

~

 

“Master Tony?”

Tony stilled because it was Jarvis asking after him, out of earshot and sight thankfully. The old chimpanzee did know something about the right time and the right place. The mansion was really big enough you could have a conversation in the spacious foyer, and accompanying living room nearby without being heard way back in the kitchen.

“I am so glad you didn’t call me Master Stark.” Tony admitted. They weren’t related by blood, but there had been enough passing resemblance between them, that Tony had honestly considered plastic surgery to get rid of it. 

It was a line of thought he had decided against because of the money and recovery involved, and the fact he wasn’t going to change one more things about himself because of Howard Stark, not anymore.

Even after he had left this place, people had of course in an attempt to appeal to his ego told him, that he looked similar to the great Howard Stark.

“I know better than that.” Jarvis sounded as if he was chiding Tony for thinking otherwise. Well, he had always got his smartassness from somewhere. “I thought perhaps if you weren’t in too much of a rush, we could speak for a moment? I do know today is difficult for you.”

Tony balled his fists, not liking where this conversation was going and gritted out through measured breath, “Do not tell me that he loved me.”  

“I do owe what I am to that man, but that is where my loyalty ends.” Jarvis replied diplomatically, a cool balm to his rising anger and hurt. “It has been years, and I have worried about how you have been. I’ve read about you. You seem to be making a name for yourself.”

“The only name that man ever bothered to give us what his last name, and I wanted nothing to do with it.”

 “You haven’t needed it. If anything, you went onto inspire your siblings to do the same.”

Tony doubted he had been the reason for that. Though he knew that most of them had picked something else. Well, aside from Steve, but he wasn’t dealing with that particular can of worms right now.

Or Natasha, who hadn’t had the chance to do so before her disappearance, still under the thumb of Howard then, but with how long she had been gone, Tony was sure, she had found a last name that she liked better.

Thor hadn’t been inspired by him in the least, given he had taken his wife’s last name. It was a move that had been incredibly controversial even if it made perfect sense. Jane was a scientist, didn’t these people knew what kind of hell it was when there was any kind of name change when you had papers you already filed under a previous name? Not everything would get linked back to you with two separate names, and it was just chaos best avoided.

More importantly, Jane hadn’t wanted to change her last name anyways. People got up in arms over the stupidest things, Tony swore.

It had been a beautiful ceremony, admittedly, it had been the last time he’d seen everyone. The private ceremony, not the public one that had to be held to keep the vultures of the press off their backs enough to plan a backup one.

Tony had spent more time conversing with Jane than talking with any of his siblings that night.

She was a beautiful and brilliant woman so of course, he had been taken with her, even if he hadn’t the slightest romantic inclination for her. And it wasn’t like he was going to steal her away, honestly, no one was going to leave Thor for anyone else. Not with a physique like a god, and a puppy like personality, aside from a few flaws. 

But really, who among them didn’t have flaws?

“Right. So how have you been? Howard wasn’t treating you badly, right?” It hadn’t seemed like Howard’s cruelty had extended much to his closest associate but then on the other hand, Tony was incredibly wary of that man for good reason.

“No.” Jarvis didn’t sound like he was lying, so that was a relief because if he had been he’d definitely ask Bucky to try and resurrect Howard so he could kill him for it. “Just getting older, I suppose. The cane helps, but I find I can’t get around as easily as I use to.”

“Hm, I could make a jetpack of sorts. It’d take the weight off your legs, but then the landings could be rough, a flight stabilizer, maybe?” Tony said more to himself than Jarvis, the schematics filling in his head now.

“That’s quite alright.” Jarvis said, but he looked amused at the thought, nonetheless. “Perhaps, when I was younger. I shall leave the flying to you.”

“Ah, buddy, you know I don’t have any powers. The power of my mind doesn’t count.”

That had been made abundantly clear when he’d been younger, and made that same argument to Howard. What did it matter if he didn’t have powers like the reason of him? If he was smart enough, then he could do something.

“And you, Master Tony? How have you been?”

“You’re always so formal, it makes it feel like you’re our butler.” That had been far from the case, Mom had been the one who had really looked after all of them with the cooking and cleaning. Even if Jarvis had certainly acted more part of father than Howard ever did despite the difference of species. He should see her, but during the funeral, she had seemed slightly off so Tony figured it was better to give her some time alone. “I’ve been fine. Just had a couple of headaches lately. Probably been looking at too many screens.”

“Right, well, if there is ever a problem, you could call us.”

Tony clicked his tongue. He tried to imagine going to his siblings about any of his problems, and he knew it wouldn’t end well when they only seemed to be able to tolerate each other in small doses.

How on Earth had they all lived together at one point?

“Me, you can call me.” Jarvis rephrased, his hand resting gently on Tony’s forearm, looking up at him earnestly. “I do pick up the phone. Though, if you prefer email.”

“I’ll try to write.” Tony nodded, he didn’t have the best memory, but if it was Jarvis, he could make an effort. It was likely shitty to drop off the radar as he had, but he had to get out of the house when he had years ago, even if it had meant leaving with nothing. “See ya.”

Tony hailed a cab when he exited the house. At least, he could breathe easier now.

 

~

 

“So let me get this straight, your father dies, and then your lost long sister drops from the sky looking no older than the day you lost her?” Sam asked, wondering if he had gotten all that the first time.

With Bucky it was really hard to tell when he was bullshitting him or not because his family was just that weird. Also with Bucky, his sense of timing was dreadful, always showing up after dark like an illicit lover.

At least, the noise he had heard in his backyard wasn’t a raccoon as he feared, and instead Bucky, who was allergic to entering his house but damn well seemed to enjoy lounging on his back porch and drinking his coffee.

“It’s weird. She’s like still a kid, but she’s not a kid?” That still threw Bucky for a loop if he was being honest, he had to look to Steve, several times throughout the day to make sure he wasn’t imagining it.

Not that he had much of anything aside from booze and weed today. Relatively mild all things considered, but it took the edge off. Not that he was really mourning Howard all that hard given the training that man had put him through. It was hard to have any amount of love for a man who locked you in a mausoleum when you were a child even if he had ‘raised’ them.

“I thought she was in her late teens?”

Bucky groaned, “You know that’s a kid when you’re our age.”

“Way to make me sound like an old man.” Sam rolled his eyes, wondering when he’d turned into a senior citizen. Thirties weren’t old, may have come with some aches and wrinkles but it wasn’t old. He looked damn fine, how dare Bucky try and age him up. “Here, I go to the trouble of comforting you, and all I get is insults.”

“Don’t give me that. You don’t get to bitch, it’s my turn to bitch.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, go on, and let me hear this sob story of yours unfold.” Sam teased. To anyone else it would probably look like they didn’t get along, but no, that really was just how the two of showed affection. “Tell me, since this was a funeral, it means all of you were together, so I’m guessing Steve and what was it, Tony? Trying your patience again?”

“Their unresolved tension threatened to overshadow Natasha’s return.” Bucky sighed, it still didn’t make sense how two people could be that much of a disaster, and yet they were, at every turn, equally exhausting all of them.

It may have been cute when they were younger but now it was just tiring.

“Your entire family really needs therapy.” Sam paused thoughtfully for a moment, “I’m not sure there’s a therapist alive who could handle all that.”

“Be glad you’re not a therapist.”

“I am.” Sam nodded. “In school, I thought about it for a hot minute, and now, I see that? That was God, guiding me away from a lifetime of trouble by convincing me to join the force instead. I would be the unlucky sucker stuck with you all.”

“Oh, speaking of unlucky, I should warn you,” Bucky mentioned because despite how it looked he did actually like Sam, and he’d hate for his family to be thing that drove him away even if it was a smart call. “Steve might try something crazy to get Tony’s attention so he might ask you to fake marry me.”

Same blinked languidly and his mouth agape for several seconds before seemingly capable of speech again. “What… what does he think this is? A romcom?”

“He doesn’t like it when I die, so faking my death I feel is not going to be a suggestion he’ll take seriously.” Bucky sighed again, shrugging his shoulders. This was all things normal in his family, but to anyone else it was probably rather intense. “He just had that look in his eyes, like, oh no, Tony is ignoring me, whatever should I do? You should have seen Thor’s wedding. He broke more than one glass when Tony ignored him to talk to Jane instead, even Thor, the person marrying Jane was telling him to calm down.”

“So when faking your death, what would you like the coroner’s report to say? I got a favor I can call in.” Sam chimed in helpfully, as if that was very illegal, but Bucky was nonetheless touched by the show of support.

Unfortunately it wasn’t going to help knowing Steve, which Bucky reminded him of by saying it again. “Steve isn’t going to go along with it, and it’s not like you’d be my first choice to fake marry anyways.”

“Oh, really?” Sam raised an eyebrow, clearly incredulous. “Who else you gonna call? Your drug dealer doesn’t count.”

“You don’t know my drug dealer?” Bucky wasn’t stupid enough to do that in front of Sam, there were limits to plausible deniability. He didn’t actually want to make Sam’s life harder. Well, not all of the times. 

Sometimes when he was being a dick, sure, but not all the time.

“I’m a detective, of course, I know your drug dealer.” That was Sam’s smug tone, his ‘how dare you underestimate me’ tone that he got with perps the rare times that Bucky had been nearby enough to see Sam in action to know he was a force to be reckoned with.

“Why do I talk to you again?” Bucky sighed, that tone wasn’t fun when it was aimed at him. But now that he thought about it, he guessed it made sense why Sam would know.

“This is really your fault, you understand.” Sam grinned, glad to remind Bucky exactly why they were in this position even months later. While Bucky had seemed content to be a one and go kind of meeting, Sam, on the other hand was petty enough to go after the man that had annoyed him so severely. “You’re the one who one day picked me and was like hey, you know that murder case you were assigned? I know the guy who did it because the victim told me. Do you have any idea how annoying that was? Like yeah, you were right, but your word doesn’t cut it in a court of law. So I still had to bust my ass for the following weeks finding the evidence.” 

“Really regretting that now. Most people would have just written me off.”

“Your grunge look does make you look like a junkie, unfortunately. Of course, using drugs really doesn’t help your case, either.”

Bucky felt like he was pointing out the obvious, but he suggested. “Why not arrest me again?”

Sam sighed, clearly annoyed from this old argument. “Because I’ve told you repeatedly, I do not agree with how we treat addicts in this country, you don’t deserve to go to jail because you have a problem. You need help.”

“Sobriety doesn’t seem to work out for me long term.” Bucky laughed, it was probably the wrong reaction to have but it was the only one he could muster up. He could do short term bursts of sobriety but long term seemed like a pipe dream.

“Yeah, well, most people can’t hear the dead either, so don’t be too hard on yourself.” Sam pointed out, his shoulders bumping against his own on the back steps of his house. Out of sight, and out of the view from a lot of the world with the picket fence. “Whatever time you do spend sober isn’t wasted, even if you do fall off the wagon again. It’s only important that you keep trying.”

“Are you sure you’re a detective, again?” Bucky questioned, his voice softer than he intended, but it was hard to have his usual irritated tone after hearing something like that.

“I know, you must be confused that I’m not doing the whole shoot first and ask questions never, right?” Sam drank from his cup of coffee before realizing it was empty with a grimace given they’d been speaking for a few minutes, now.

Bucky chuckled, “No wonder you and Steve get along so well. You’re both so righteous.”

“He really can give long winded speeches.” Sam shook his head. “The first time we met, I swear, it was like being read the riot act as if you couldn’t take care of yourself or like I was doing anything but tracking down this weird white boy who could speak to the dead.”

“Weird?”

“You did come out of the dumpster, remember?”

“That’s usually where we find Clint.”

“I can’t believe your family has a designated dumpster sibling.” Sam added, “And it’s not you.”

 

~

 

“So that blur line was bullshit, right?” Clint asked from behind her.

Natasha had known coming up to Clint’s spot of all places, the place he had looked out so much and often when he had been younger meant that Clint would probably know when she scurried off here.

The attic remained unfinished even after all these years, it had been a surprise, there were plans before she had disappeared to turn this into something, she couldn’t remember now, but it seemed those plans never carried through. So here it was an empty husk of a room, with one nice wide window that leads into the fire escape that made for a perfect urban balcony.

The perfect place to get away from it all.

The sky was pretty, faint stars bleeding through the light and noise pollution of city life, it really nailed in the fact that she was home now.

“You don’t have a crack in your mask unless something really unnerves you.” Clint went on, not deterred by her silence, a lot more confident in himself now fully grown it seemed. “But you also don’t get nervous easily. So something really bad happened, didn’t it?”

Natasha wondered how does she even begin to explain her past, or rather an already lived future when this is actually past? Or is it her present now?

Time is tricky like that.

“I mean, you don’t have to tell me right away, I don’t think anyone else really noticed.”

Clint’s codename wasn’t Hawkeye for nothing. Despite being blessed with marksmanship which made him incredibly deadly with anything that required precision, his sight was second to none. He picked up on things other people didn’t, and didn’t rely fully on his ability to get by either. So while everyone else had been distracted for some reason or another, he hadn’t been and had immediately picked up something.

Part of Natasha wanted to cry, she wanted to give into the vulnerable impulse and just be comforted and let no other words speak between them for the rest of the night while Clint just held her.

The larger part of her, the her that knew she had a mission beat that small part of her into submission.

“What if I told you the world was ending?” She asked, casually, as if it were just a game instead of a reality she knew was coming, and coming fast at all.

“I’d believed you.” Clint spoke without hesitation. “I don’t really care about what our so called dad said, I trust you. You say the world is ending, then I’m trusting your word.”

“Thank you.” Natasha said softly. It was nice to not have someone second guess herself when this could all be nothing but something she managed up in her head to cope with the dark future she had seen unfold.

“So what can we do?”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It wasn’t that Steve never misbehaved.
> 
> Or even that he was the least likely of all his siblings to get into trouble, though he may have the appearance of such, in truth that honor belonged to Bruce.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uwu who's surprised I updated? 
> 
> I warned y'all I'm chronically ill. As a whole, this was done a while ago but it needed a lot of edits and rewrites, and honestly there are probably still some mistakes or sections I'm less than thrilled about, but you know what, it's okay, if it's not perfect! 
> 
> Anyways, uh, I don't think I need anymore tags or I'm just too spacey to think about them right now, so if you feel like I need more lemme know. With that said, Enjoy!

It wasn’t that Steve never misbehaved.

Or even that he was the least likely of all his siblings to get into trouble, though he may have the appearance of such, in truth that honor belonged to Bruce.

It was simply that he wasn’t thought of as doing something as childish or imperfect as misbehaving. When he did, being the slated Number One of the family and of the Academy, it was a severe disappointment not to be repeated.

So he strive for the impossible, for perfection and understandably, he never quite measured up. There were things he couldn’t let happen even if it went against what he was told, or what he was supposed to do.

So typically it played out in one of two ways, either their Father hadn’t believed Steve was responsible either lacking the proof or just believing him someone who could actually measure up to his impossible standards and blamed one of his siblings instead when, for once, they weren’t guilty. Or one of his siblings upon seeing something Steve was responsible for decided to take the fall instead knowing they’d likely get blamed for it anyways but wanting Steve to do something for them in return as Number One, he did have some degree of special privileges not granted to anyone else.

It was still suffocating some days his position, and surprisingly the one he sought comfort from most was Tony. The fringe member of their family but never forgotten.

Tony’s room was rather narrow and small, so fitting two people in it while possible always kept them rather close together. Sometimes that’s exactly what Steve wanted to take comfort in the accidental brush of contact of another person driven by proximity, not purpose. Or sometimes, it was a deliberate action, seeking comfort, and letting his entire world shrink down to arms trying to wrap around him and soothe him until all his worries melted away even if only for a moment. Other times however, any contact is too much, or even just being too close. The air feels electric, and his chest feels heavy with anticipation and fright as his thoughts race with dangerous curiosity of just how bad it just might be if he just made it clear how different his feelings were for Tony compared to the rest of his siblings.  

Perhaps it should be weird to feel that way about Tony but to Steve it always made sense. Tony had always been separate from him, from all of them in due part thanks to lack of his powers. Tony couldn’t very well go on missions as he was and not come back injured. Perhaps it would have been a different story if Tony had been forced to undergo the same training as them, but it wasn’t something their Father required of him, leaving Tony more often than not to spending time by himself, or with Jarvis or Mom rather than any of his siblings.

On occasion, their Father requested Tony’s aid to take part in assignment when he needed another hand, one particular incident came to mind which had been a time trial in which Tony had been timing all of them while their Father looked on and commented on occasion.

This wasn’t to say they never spent any time together, that they didn’t have to carve out themselves. Meal time was a communal event and as such, Tony was there, even if meals were meant to be silent affairs something for sustenance and for additional audio learning instead of the needless chatter of children.  There wasn’t much of it, but they did have down time, times where even their Father was too busy to keep too close of an eye of what they were doing and when the divides between siblings and Tony seemed to melt away to the peripheral.  

But it never quite disappeared, always present in some sense.

“You’re getting too big for my bed, big guy.” Tony snickered.

Steve glanced down at his body, it was strange looking down and seeing something other than the small and scrawny one he had most of his entire life. It had never been easy for him to gain weight, always underweight that made him appear unfed or unfit despite how he ate or how much he worked out. It had only changed in the last couple of months, shortly after their joint eighteenth birthday where all the height and muscle that had been lurking around in his DNA somewhere finally made itself known.

Father had said he wasn’t surprised, that he always known Steve was just a late bloomer, and that he’d always end up like that. And that hadn’t set well with Steve, he might have been small, but he hadn’t thought there was anything wrong with his body.

He had enjoyed power trip if he was being honest of people seeing someone so slightly, someone who cleared looked like they weren’t a threat and then being thrown across the room for underestimating him during a mission, that look of betrayal and confusion was always nice.

And then there had been how well he fit into Tony’s arms before then, too, now Tony struggle to wrap his arms around Steve completely in a tight hug with his new girth and he missed that feeling of being entirely enveloped.

“Are you uncomfortable?” Steve took up much more space now, space he hadn’t needed before but now needed to be comfortable and not hold that tension in his body from folding in on himself like he sometimes caught himself doing. Not that he wouldn’t gladly do it, if Tony needed that, though.

“Have I kicked you out my bed yet?” Tony asked sweetly as if he would never do such a thing.

Which was a boldfaced lie, Tony had done so before, not without Steve’s help however. It was usually always in jest, so Steve had never minded going along with the motions and finding himself down on the floor, looking up at Tony’s bright eyes and grinning face, when he looked so, so happy. It was worth any temporary discomfort to see that look on Tony’s face, who very rarely looked like he was truly happy.

Steve wasn’t arrogant enough to think Tony only looked happy with him, he was however willingly to bet he pulled a few expressions out of Tony that no one else saw.

Such shared, secretive moments were sacred to him.

“I feel like I haven’t had time for you lately…” Steve trailed off, not quite knowing how else to phrase it but it was the true. Seeing Tony recently had been difficult, it seemed like the gimmick of super powered children was now wearing off given they were passing the threshold of adulthood which brought upon a whole host of questions and legal responsibilities.

Needless to say, their Father had been busy, attempting to make them relevant again to make people see the reason in why this academy had been made in the first place, with only one inaugural class.

There had been plans, and there were others, other like them but if Tony had no powers, then couldn’t that mean some of the others while born under very creepy circumstances were the same? Were they really the only ones with powers?

Steve had asked once and had been met with silence. Silence as always, if it wasn’t a demand.

“I don’t blame you for that.”

The you went unspoken, one thing that never failed to rile Tony up was mentioning their Father, so Steve had learnt quickly not to do so or Tony very well would find something else to do pointedly.

“Still…” Steve had felt guilty about it which is why he had been doing something behind Tony’s behind. It was always a risk involving anyone other than Bruce or Natasha, none of the others seemed very good at keeping a secret. It could be kept from their Father, sure, but it would spread throughout the siblings, and eventually end back at Tony’s ear which would ruin the surprise he had worked so hard on to begin with. “Do you want to go to the roof?”

Tony liked the stars, though being in an urban environment that meant it wasn’t the best weather to see them but it wasn’t like either of them had ever known any different. One day, Steve waned to take Tony out in the middle of nowhere, and just lay with him in the grass and watch the unobscured sky with him.

He didn’t know when that would be, but Steve held onto the hope that one day he could make it happen, somehow.

“Is the good Captain suggesting we sneak out?”

“I did already sneak into your room after curfew.” Steve reminded.

“Yes, I know. It’s funny how people think you’re so straight laced. I knew you had a secret chaotic center underneath all that righteousness.”

Tony sounded fond and while Steve wasn’t surprised Tony had that reaction, after all, he knew Tony had chaotic leanings himself and liked that in others, or else how did describe the antics Tony got up to sometimes with his siblings? Clint and Tony were an especially lethal combination but they weren’t often subtle with their tricks. The fireworks incidents of two years back had meant both of them had to be watched around those kind of materials with an inkling of pyromania in both of them. Less Clint who liked to okay any bad idea he heard because he liked to see what would happen and more Tony who liked the lights and pops of fireworks lit up into a show stopping display.  

Steve had teetered back and forth about employing Clint’s services but in the end had decided to go for it, trusting Clint’s eyes and his impressive library of bird calls to alert them in case their Father got suspicious and went looking for him or Tony. While it might be the knowledge of tonight would get spread between his siblings, it would be after the fact so it was okay in Steve’s opinion since none of them could ruin the surprise now since Tony was right beside him. 

They still had to be careful about sneaking out of the house and onto the roof without making any loud noises that could draw attention. Tony had said previously the entire house wasn’t under surveillance but some sections were and Steve trusted Tony’s judgement so he believed that without question.

Surprisingly Tony could be stealthy despite the lack of training. Although it was more, Tony lacked the formal training the rest of them had but in their various sneaking out, someone had to make sure Tony didn’t falter so he had to be taught how to get around quietly too. Steve could see Natasha’s tutelage in how Tony stepped, light and soft, how he quieted his breaths, and how graceful it had looked.  But then he always did look at Tony, didn’t he?

Steve reminded himself not to get distracted lest he make a mistake and alert their Father. He still hadn’t quite gotten used to all the changes in his body yet so he was somewhat clumsier than he had been when he’d been small and frail looking. Thor could be quiet without problems so Steve knew it wasn’t an impossible feat for him yet, just something he had to strive towards.

The roof wasn’t quite the same as a full on excursion to the outside world which they really weren’t allowed to do outside of missions, but naturally, they had all broken those rules either together or separately. Steve as of late had been taking more trips outside not because he’d been feeling more reckless lately though he had played up that angle around his siblings just to have something to fall back on if he was asked about why he was making these trips. Rather than the truth of the matter which was to get things for Tony.

Some things weren’t just allowed in the house, though Steve had been able to procure a few items from the house without knowledge because they weren’t looked after or because it was rarely so as long as he put it back in place in time hopefully no one would ever know. It wasn’t too extravagant in the end because too much and he risked everything, and while he had indeed wanted to give Tony whatever he wanted, that wasn’t feasible at the moment.

Still, Steve thought he did a good job with what he did put together nonetheless.

He had bought twinkling star fairy lights since the urban landscape didn’t make the best viewing. So if the sky couldn’t provide the stars for Tony, then Steve could provide the stars for Tony from an artificial standpoint yes but Tony did very much like electronics. There were some pale white lights, others a more golden yellow, and even a few multicolored ones all strung out above the makeshift resting area Steve had put together.

Steve had borrowed a few sheets from around the house layering them on top of each other to mimic a picnic blanket since that wasn’t quite as easy to have on his person as he had thought it would have been so he had to default to one of his backup plans. The top layer was a vivid red similar to the nail polish Tony liked to wear, it wasn’t the same shade of red that Natasha wore so Steve knew Tony himself had picked out the polish thought it was likely kept in Natasha’s room simply for plausible deniability.

Bucky wasn’t the only sibling who skewed the gender binary just Tony often seemed most comfortable in jeans and tank tops compared to anything else compared to Bucky who liked a lot of Natasha’s clothing.

Steve fetched two pillows from around the house as headrests knowing he would have to return the soon but wanting some kind of support in case Tony wanted one or both of them. Steve didn’t mind going without.

Beyond that, Steve had gotten some outside food that Tony liked. Mom cooked their meals and while there was a homemade quality to it that couldn’t be forgotten, Tony liked junk food, an indulgence Mom wasn’t very prone to giving either of them. There was usually coffee in the house, their Father was fond of it, but he kept a close eye on it after Tony had tried some one time and promptly had never been forgotten since. Tony’s fondness for coffee had been easily replicated by hitting the local donut place which was a two for one when Tony liked both donuts and coffee. So there was a box nearby with a dozen donuts and a large coffee with Tony’s name on it.

“I… you…” Tony stopped and started a few things seemingly unable to string his sentences together as he could normally. Tony’s tongue could be quite vicious when he felt slighted able to give out blithe, bold remarks or it could be completely unintelligent if he had stayed up far too long and long lost track of reason.

Steve had never quite seen Tony at a loss of words before, he was willingly to best he might have been the first to get that kind of reaction out of Tony. In a way that made Steve proud, but also hesitant.

“Do you like it?” Steve asked, unsure, and not wanting to proceeding further into he had some sort of confirmation that Tony appreciated the gesture and wasn’t creeped out by it. Steve hadn’t thought he was entirely alone in his pining, particularly if the ribbing of his siblings was anything to go by who complained as much about Tony as they did Steve in regards to their intense, intimate relationship that they all marked as something different.

“Are you joking?” Tony started and Steve felt his heart drop to his stomach. “I love it. This is… this is so nice. I don’t even really know what to say when you went through all this attention and effort for me. I’m not sure I deserve all this.”

“Tony, of course you do.”

Tony met his eyes, wary of believing in this words in a way that make Steve’s heart ache. “I wanted to do something special to make up for the fact we haven’t seen each other lately. It was no trouble at all, if anything, I’m sorry I couldn’t go more extravagant, I didn’t want F-“

“Yeah, I know.” Tony replied curtly. “But Steve, this is great. I’m really… touched? Is that the right word for it? I don’t know if it’s enough but it means more than you can know that you did all this for me. Thank you, Steve.”

“Y-yeah.” Steve had to look away from Tony for a moment who looked so happy and at peace in that moment, he had wanted nothing more than to bring Tony’s face into his hands and kiss him. “Should we sit down?”

“I would hate for all your hard work to go to waste.” Tony smiled, laying down as he lounged on the sheets and helped himself to the coffee first.

Steve joined him but kept his distance not wanting to crowd Tony, knowing that these sheets were a bit bigger than Tony’s narrow bed but still not wanting to infringe on his space. Tony handed him a donut, remembering Steve’s favorite of the dozen he handpicked for Tony.

Steve ate one underneath the glow of the artificial lights while still keeping Tony in the corner of his eyes who was looking upwards and at the sky instead.

“So did any of our siblings help? Or was this all you?” Tony wondered, grabbing a donut without even looking what it was before biting into it. It was a glazed donut with frosting and sprinkles on top of it. It was a messy one but it was a sugar filled dream according to Tony.

“No, it was all me. You know how it is you tell one-“

“All of them find out.” They said in sync.

Tony snickered. “Same brain wavelength, it seems.”

“Yeah, um, is everything okay with them too?” Steve wanted to ask because he wasn’t sure the exact status of everyone else getting in touch with Tony when he’d been secretive getting everything together for the last month or so. “I know none of us have spent a lot of time with you lately, not just me.”

“Well, I don’t blame them for that.” Tony rolled his eyes, some of his good mood seemingly ruined by his question. “Besides none of them have been really ignoring me. A little spider gives me sharp gifts, the goat gives me clothes, the hawk fetches me junk food, the puppy gets me sunglasses, and then the bear slips me scientific curiosities.”

“When you say it like that it’s like you’re a dragon collecting a hoard.”

“I would make a great dragon.” Tony remarked with all honesty. “That would be a really cool ability. Would that mean I could blow fire but I wonder how that would translate? Would that mean the inside of me is fireproof, and then where would the fire come from, would it be a simple as just one extra organ or would it be more like a small network with multiple parts in place making it work?”

Steve let Tony’s voice carry on, following the melodic tone and the enthusiasm for the topic between few moments of silence when Tony drank or ate something. Occasionally Steve reached for a donut and just wordlessly listened to Tony.

He wished he had his sketchbook but he hadn’t thought to bring up to the roof and not knowing how Tony would react if he found out how many pages he did take up in it, knowing Tony’s curiosity and how he rifled through things without always asking for permission first meant that Steve had to keep it away from Tony more often than not. But bask underneath both artificial and natural stars, paired with a happy cadence, bright eyes and overall passion for what he spoke of, Steve wanted nothing more than to commit this moment to memory.

“You’ve been staring at me.” Tony said with a raised eyebrow but who looked amused rather than annoyed at him. “Is it because I ate most of the donuts?” Tony moved closer, lowering his voice and had all his attention on Steve instead of the stars.

Steve tried to say it had nothing to do with the donuts but nothing came out, words failed him and the blood in his ears rushed throughout drowning out everything while he hyper focused on Tony in one of the most serious cases of tunnel vision yet.

He took in the remnants of powdered sugar still yet on Tony’s lips when he couldn’t met Tony’s eyes anymore only to watch Tony lick them probably instinctively to get the last bit of sugar. Steve looked up flushed because of the gesture could have been read another way and Tony’s eyes took on a different emotion looking like a mix of awe and surprise.

Feeling embolden by that, Steve went forward closing the space in between them even more until they were barely touching. If Steve just moved his mouth a certain way, his lips could be on Tony’s. In that moment, nothing else existed, merely on the edge of what might happen if he followed through with the thought of wondering what it might be like to kiss Tony, and what it might be if Tony kissed him back. 

Steve never got to find the answers to any of those questions.

“What are you two doing?”

Tony jolted back first, and sat up so quickly Steve was afraid he might get dizzy from it, immediately looking on the defense and with that line of tension Tony always got around their Father. Steve sat up more slowly, wondering if he kept his cool, if he could do something to try and make it seem like this was anything other than it was.

To be perfectly honestly he hadn’t factored in how their Father might respond to these affections, much more concerned with how Tony might view them. Steve realized now what a grave mistake that had been.

“This isn’t-“ Tony tried.

“I don’t want hear your excuse since I know Steve would never have been the one to do something like this on his own.”

“I was the one who did all this.” Steve said, his voice firm and his gaze unwavering on their Father, hoping that would be enough for the truth of the matter to actually be realized rather than a falsehood be believed instead.

“How disappointing.”

The words didn’t hurt Steve as much because he was pretty confident he wasn’t in the wrong here, and thus it didn’t really matter how it was received. “If it was my fault, then it only makes sense to punish me. Tony didn’t do anything wrong.”

“It takes two.” Howard looked between them. “The two of you clearly need to speak some time apart. I will be having two very long conversations with the both of you separately. You will not eat, sleep, or do anything if it is not without my permission since clearly neither of you can be trusted.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “I’d like to see you try.”

“Tony…” Steve warned, knowing Tony often got into fights with their Father but not seemed one of the worst times to egg him on.

The fact that they were met silence though a common response gave Steve an incredibly uneasy feeling as they were escorted back into the house. Immediately Tony was separated from him, Mom at his side and guiding him likely to his room while Steve was left with his Father. They walked until they reach Howard’s office, a place where they weren’t ordinarily allowed in but for the briefest moments.

Steve stood as Father sat down looking at him with a disappointed scowl as he rested his hands on his chin. “I’m surprised at you Steve, I wouldn’t think you’d do something so reckless given how much you care for Tony.”

“I’m afraid I don’t understand.” Steve admitted.

“You’re young so most of this is chocked up to your hormones clouding your judgement. You’re the leader, you’re expected to make the right call so you don’t needlessly endanger any of them. What good is my guidance if you get them killed?”

Steve had that fear hanging over his head more than once and it never got any easier but Tony had always been safe. “I don’t see how this involves Tony.”

“Mark my words, he’ll come to you regardless of my warnings and he will try to convince you that he can help, that he can stay here and help with the electronics providing remote support. But it isn’t the safe bet he thinks it is. Maria wasn’t built to be a warrior, she’ll do her best, of course as she was programmed too, but don’t you think if our enemies suddenly find out there’s a new variable in the picture they’ll come looking to see who that is? If none of us are here to protect him, as he’s powerless, then nothing will be able to save him. And you by fostering this closeness will be the one to blame.”

“He’s said nothing of the sort.” It was true and not true, Tony was so brilliant, so bright, that Steve couldn’t always keep up but their Father wasn’t wrong, was he? There had been sly suggestions here and there from Tony who had said how an invention of his might be used for something, while it had never been so direct, the seed was there.

It was clearly something Tony wanted to bring up in time, and having their Father hone on this, only made that feel so much more real.

“But he will. I want you to think very, very careful about what this indulgence of yours might cost him if nothing else. You cannot prioritize one over the group as it is as it reflects poorly of you, if you play favoritism, as well. What would your other siblings say, I would wonder?”

Steve knows none of them seem to care, but with the idea of Tony’s death on his hands, the idea he alone might be responsible for that his response fall short. There’s silence for a moment or two.

“You’re dismissed.”

 

~

 

Anything Steve was going to say next died in his throat because he’s immediately filled with a sense of dread when the look comes across Tony’s face. The conversation hadn’t been going well to begin with, Tony had started to get increasingly annoyed and less willingly to hear him out with the roll of his eyes and snide comments under his breath. Then a blanket of betrayal and hurt flickers across Tony’s features, the emotion so deep they had even caused unshed tears to well in Tony’s beautiful brown eyes.

Tony doesn’t make an attempt to hide that he’s biting his lips, or looking to the side, anywhere but Steve as eventually there’s a shuddering breath to steady himself.

Instinctively Steve reached out to touch Tony, to try and smooth over this understanding before it becomes something he can’t take back.

“Don’t touch me.” Tony smacked his hand away, eyes ablaze with anger and his voice raising in turn. “Don’t ever touch me again, come to think about it! God, I was so stupid, what I was thinking? Why did I ever think…”  

“Tony-“ Steve doesn’t reach out, but he does speak and the glare Tony pins him with thereafter is enough for him to immediately stop talking.

“I thought you were different. I’ll never make that mistake again.”

Tony walked away, and it doesn’t take long for someone to round the corner, peeking in if it’s now safe to intrude. Steve just felt shell-shocked, surprised that had spiraled out of control so badly and so quickly, that it’s even hard to breathe.

He ends up crouched on the ground, folding in on himself like he had all the times before when being the leader weighted too heavily on him. Steve wondered would this have happened if it he wasn’t in charge.

He’s too out of it to know who it is that wraps their arms around them, just that their presence comforting and warm. Everything outside of the pressure and temperature fades away from his awareness as he circled over again and again how that could have gone differently and what he needs to do next to change things.

He’s in a daze when he’s corralled back to his room, but the milky white small hands belong to Natasha who showed no qualms about jumping into bed with him, knowing there was nothing else that would at least force him to try and sleep that night.

“It’ll be okay, Steve.” She said, softly. Softly that she ever usually speaks. “Eventually.” She added, because she is a realist at heart.

It’s of little comfort, but Steve figured, things couldn’t get any worse.

 

~

 

He is proven wrong on two notable occasions about how much worse things can get. So he stops thinking about how it can’t get any worse than this, afraid to invite something worse to his door once more.

 

~

 

Steve had imagined a lot of things when he saw Tony again. He thought about apologizing, about explaining why he said what he said, he thought about asking Tony about everything he been up to in the years since because he didn’t know what was true and what was fake when he read about Tony in the news.

Same face, but new name, and no known ties back to the Stark family exactly as Tony had wanted it. But Thor’s wedding was a happy occasion, and though Thor wasn’t sure if Tony would even see the invite at all, it had been sent nonetheless.

The real genuine wedding, not the one that had been taken over by other celebrities and the press who insisted the union between Thor, a hot new celebrity now and his celebrated scientist wife was a public affair that needed to be documented. That had been only made worse by the mention the rest of the siblings, all but one, but really two would be in attend and that had been an ordeal that honestly made Steve want to stay at the Academy for weeks on end than face that circus.

Well no, he shouldn’t say circus given how fondly Clint spoke of his time in the circus and how needed it had been to find a place to belong after Natasha’s disappearance and after leaving the academy like all the rest of the siblings. Leaving Steve as the only one remaining in that house with Father, Mom and Jarvis.

A possibility that he hadn’t prepared himself for was that Tony would glue himself to Jane’s side. Steve didn’t really think Tony was after her, he had to have taken one look at Thor and know how besotted he was with Jane and how much it would hurt him to do such a thing so Steve didn’t believe that he would. Rather Steve was certain that it was Jane’s mind that drew Tony to her, Jane who looked rather happy all things consider to chatter away happily with Tony about scientific stuff.

Tony who had not even said one word to him despite having shared one solid glance with him which had seemingly been by accident but who had averted his gaze when Steve returned it with a shell shocked one.

The last time Steve had saw Tony in person was when baby fat had still lingered on Tony’s face which had been marred with raw anger and grief, most of it had been aimed towards their Father who had threatened Tony with being cut off if he made true on his threat to leave the academy. The threat hadn’t stopped Tony, and it had been clear that some of that anger had been directed at him too when Steve had attempted to stop Tony from leaving only for his hands to be swatted away and levelled with a dark glare before he left for good.

Tony’s face was now fully framed with a goatee and his jawline had only become more defined since then as well. His skin that had always taken well to what limited sun he’d had seen in the past, now was more tan a sure sign of increased sun exposure that fit with what kind of life Tony now lived. Another inch or two had been added to his height, and he appeared less lanky that he’d been as a teenager which hinted at some sort of physical regimen with how the suit fit him. It was a three piece dark suit that fit Tony snugged in a way that suggested it had been tailored made especially for his body paired with a red suit tie that helped make him standout. Dark sunglasses not fully opaque hid Tony’s eyes, acting like a shield between him and the rest of the world. Tony’s hair was more styled than it was a teen where he hadn’t spent nearly as much time on it.

Steve didn’t really know when his grip on the glass had turned from the normal strength he handled objects with as not to break them and into something instead that would shatter it.

“Jesus, Steve…” Bucky said from his side overlooking his hand now stained with red and with glass shards embedded into the flesh.

Steve uncurled his hand, the gesture alone shook some loose onto the table that held a few glass shards of its own. It wasn’t that Steve didn’t feel pain because he did, but it hadn’t seem to rank very highly on the list right now.

“And this is why I always have to travel with a first aid kit seeing any of you.” Bruce sighed, sounding tired. He knew Steve’s healing factor didn’t do well if objects were left inside of him thus had to be tweezed out carefully and then and only then could the wounds heal properly without issue.

“You gotta admit Nat would have gotten a kick out of this.” Clint snickered, seeming amused more than alarmed the display.

Thor had casted a concerned look over when their table had descended in minor chaos, but still seemed mostly content to let Tony and Jane talk away despite the fact it was their wedding of all things. Steve couldn’t really understand why it didn’t bother Thor, but then Thor had always been rather mellow.

Steve as Natasha had said had no chill.

He knew it was irrational to act like this, that he should deal with his emotions in a more positive, productive manner but it had been years of silence. Silence Tony didn’t seem to want to end, and being denied even the barest bit of attention was upsetting.

They’d been so close once and now they were like strangers.

Maybe if he asked Bruce to teach him about science, that would be able to bridge the gap that had formed between him and Tony. Or use Bruce as an intermediary to begin with.

All Steve got to accomplish in the end was looking towards Bruce before then Thor came towards their table which meant a new world of possibilities opened up so he switched tactics accordingly. “Is Tony even talking to you?”

“Briefly.” Thor answered. “He and Jane have much in common. I didn’t realize he was also a fan of her work, it is refreshing to be around those who see her brilliance. Many can just be blinded by her beauty which is understandable.”

Thor sighed in awe, one could almost see the heart eyes.

“How is he?”

“He seems well. Are you well?” Thor eyed the glass on the table. “You’re fortunate Bruce was around.”

“I, again, don’t know how I got designated as team doctor, when that isn’t even my degree.” Bruce sighed, sounding even more tired before eyeing the rest of his siblings. “If any of you let him have a glass, I will hand you the tweezers and you can fish out the glass instead.”

“Oh, this is going to turn into the worst game of operation.” Clint chuckled, sounding excited at the thought than deterred.

“That is surprisingly not my problem. I will try and talk to Tony, knowing him, he will tell me to flip you of or to say something rather colorful.”

“Can you just tell him I’m sorry?” Steve sighed, resting his head in hands not really knowing what else to say. He felt comforted by Bucky’s hand on his shoulder at least.

“I can do that. No promises, he says something nice in return.”

Steve suspected as much but he nothing but hope left at this point. In the end, he didn’t disagree with all of his reasoning that fateful day that had turned Tony away from him. He was afraid that Tony as bright and brilliant as he was would paint himself a target because behind the scenes didn’t much suit Tony knowing he’s pushed the envelope further and further until Tony end up in the field for whatever reasoning he could muster. As if all his tech expertise couldn’t likely be done from behind the scenes.

 It would be different if Tony had training even without powers, but he had nothing of the sorts and he had not wanted to live through a teammate’s death. And yet he had in a way. Natasha was lost in time, and well they all remained hopeful, each year that passed made that hope a little dimmer.

He just hadn’t wanted to lose Tony but he had said entirely the wrong thing.

Steve looked up having taken his momentary retrieve with the chatter of Bucky, Clint and Thor around him sounding pleasant and the tone a wedding should be. He had to perk up, had to act like he wasn’t falling apart because this was a happy occasion.

At that moment when his eyes settled on Tony again, there was Tony with a bright smile, chiming with laughter as he drew Bruce close to him in a hug, looking very happy, not at all uncomfortable with the affection. That hadn’t impacted him much as Steve knew that Tony and Bruce had always been rather close and he knew while he wasn’t one hundred percent certain of Tony’s feelings, that Bruce had no such feelings for Tony at the very least.

It was more of a relief than Steve was willingly to admit some days, while there was a pang of jealously at the sight. Tony deserved to be happy to see Bruce and welcome him with open arms.

What had surprised Steve was that Tony had done the same to Jane who clearly looked a little surprised to be on the receiving end of affection from him when Tony had thus built up his reputation in recent years about having some strange quirks.

That… that provoked an irrational response. Steve had taken the near empty glass out of Bucky’s hand without even pausing to think about it and letting it shatter once again into his hands and onto the table.

“Do you think there’s a groupon for family therapy?” Clint had asked sounding bored which betrayed the fact he fetched the tweezer off the table and went to work on Steve’s hand.

“I don’t think there’s a therapist dumb enough alive for that.” Bucky answered, overlooking Steve once again. “At least it wasn’t full you big dope. Can’t go complain about me drinking when you pull shit like that.”

“While I’m sympathetic to your plight, there’s no need for all this.”

“Right…” Steve felt a flood of shame then. “I’m sorry, Thor. I’ll go talk a walk after this and clear my head a bit and I promise I’ll be a model guest after the fact.”

“I’ll go with you.” Bucky added, “Wouldn’t want you to get in a fight with a tree that looked at you wrong.”

 

~

 

Everything that leads up to the funeral is more of the same.

He’s the one that stays, that becomes his defining role and Father seems to grow more bitter about that but there was little he could do to reign in the rest of his errant children. Steve wouldn’t want anyone to be forced to come back after he’s beginning to see why they all left to begin with. None of them were quite as rash as Tony’s departure which had seemed to mostly have been done in the heat of the moment even if there were preparations ahead of the fact since Tony had to have survived on his own somehow.

Sometimes Steve thinks about leaving but then he worries about what their Father might do if he leaves as well, they’re all adults now so there’s a limit to what he could do to them versus when they were children but Steve doesn’t want to bring his siblings anymore suffering than there’s been already.

If staying here helps abates Father’s mood which only seems to be worsening, then well, Steve can bear it.

He deserves to bear it after everything, doesn’t he?

Still, despite that, their Father’s death still takes him by surprise, as if death was something the great Howard Stark could avoid when he was only a man in the end. The world was strange, but well Steve wasn’t sure if it was strange enough where one could become immortal.

Steve calls everyone despite not knowing who will appear and who won’t.

One thing is for sure, Tony won’t come to mourn Father that much Steve is certain of.

 

~

 

It’s been a literal cloud over his head for over a decade and closer to fifteen years, if Natasha could finally return from her trip through time then why couldn’t he and Tony reconcile?

Or rather, Steve wasn’t letting another chance go by without a fight.

The wedding reception hadn’t been the place for their drama, and Tony had disappeared shortly after he went to clear his head, and again, had more or less ignored all of his attempts to contact him until Steve was pretty much sure his messages weren’t even getting through.

This time though, he was much more willingly to bite the bullet and deal with whatever Tony threw at him. Which mostly involved a lot of calling of Tony’s personal cellphone something he had never had access to before but lo and below Jarvis had ‘accidentally’ left the information around for him to find and naturally Steve took advantage of that.

Steve wasn’t sure how many times he called Tony or how many messages he left him until finally a call from Tony came through the home phone. A call that had admittedly caught him off guard because he’d just witnessed something incredibly strange from their mom and was more than a little unmoored from it. Father had been a very difficult man, but it was hard to speak ill of their mother, the one who had looked after them all these years and who had always been kind and loving towards them. So the idea of something being wrong with her, in an area of expertise that Steve wasn’t already that familiar with? On top of the circumstances at hand?

Yeah, he felt a little frazzled. He had wanted nothing more for this call, but he had a moment of wanting to let it go to voicemail and return to it later than answer with his nerves like this.

“Before I begin, I want to say still having a home phone? Super retro and in the bad way, please get a smartphone. No, no, wait, I can’t trust you on your own to purchase one, ask one of the other siblings, one of the ones you didn’t say was ordinary and worthless to their face.”

“Tony-“

“Nope, now in your many, many messages, like seriously Steve how much free time do you think I have?” Tony scoffed, sounding annoyed. “You didn’t mention anyone was sick, dying or dead, so am to assume our siblings are in as good of health as I last saw them?”

“Yes.”

“Okay, then, we don’t actually have anything to talk about. I’ll say talk you later, but I don’t actually want to do that, so bye.”

“Wait, Mom.”

“…What about Mom?” Tony asked, clearly wary of the abrupt change of subject.

“Look, I didn’t know if you were actually listening to my messages or not so I didn’t mention that.”

“Definitely not shady, at all, but go on. Spin this tale.”

“She’s been acting a little weird, I didn’t notice it at first and that’s on me, I should have realized it ahead of time but you know I don’t understand those things quite as well as you do.” It was more than his desperate need to have a reconciliation with Tony, but a real concern for their Mom that had his tone turn pleading.

“You know Jarvis is smart, too, right? I’m not just the guy you call when something goes wrong.” There was that sing-song tone Tony got in his voice usually before he did whatever he wanted, meaning Steve only had so much time to convince Tony that this was serious and he needed to come back.

“I know that you hated Father, but you never once hated our mom. I know that you choose the last name Carbonell because that was the name of her favorite painter, more than that, I know you were always smarter than F-Howard ever was and that you’re not the kind of person who can hear something is wrong and not try and do something to fix it if you can.”

“I swear to god, if you’re lying-“ The lack of Tony’s faith in him stun but Steve wasn’t surprised by it.

“I wouldn’t. I want to talk things out but this is more important. We lost one parent, regardless of the kind of man he was, I don’t want to lose another one.”

“…I’ll be right over.”

**Author's Note:**

> If you wanna chat, I'm on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/thiefoftruth26). I sometimes post snippets or how the progress is going for fics.


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